GUEST MOVIE REVIEW: Halloween Franchise

Halloween Film Reviews

The Halloween franchise has been frightening audiences for generations, beginning with John Carpenter’s 1978 classic, and leading to Halloween (2018). With two more films set for release: Halloween Kills (2021) and Halloween Ends (2022), it’s the perfect time to revisit the films and see what made them so special. And also, which ones don’t quite make the cut in terms of quality.

The following is a non-spoiler review and opinion of almost every Halloween film ever made, ranked in order of importance. I am omitting the Rob Zombie versions from this list because I have not seen them and cannot make an accurate judgment. Nor do I want to.

Halloween (1978): The granddaddy of slashers. Its status is cemented in popular culture for good reason. From the opening credits to the film’s iconic musical score, it induces a sense of dread at every turn. When we hear those infamous piano keys, we feel the danger looming, knowing Michael Meyers is close. We are introduced to Laurie Strode, played brilliantly by Jamie Lee Curtis, a comely high school student who is relegated to babysitting on Halloween while her friends are off partying. She becomes the accidental heroine by fending off Michael, and protecting the children while Dr. Loomis searches for his escaped mental patient.

In terms of quality, it is still the gold standard for the franchise and slasher films in general.

Five Stars.

Halloween II (1981): Although he wrote and co-produced Halloween’s second entry, John Carpenter passed the director’s chair to Rick Rosenthal. Halloween II picks up the moment the first film ends. After Dr. Loomis fires six shots into Michael, he disappears, leaving Loomis to continue his search. With Laurie seriously injured, she is transported to Haddonfield Memorial Hospital for treatment. Michael continues his rampage, following Laurie to the hospital to finish what he started.

Halloween II doesn’t quite capture the same magic as the original, but it’s a very worthy sequel that streamlines one film to the next.

Four Stars.

Halloween (2018): I’d have to put this above all the sequels that came before it. As far as canon, this new entry pretends that nothing exists past Halloween (1978), even excluding Halloween II for no other reason that I can see, than to keep the dynamic of Laurie and Michael mysterious, meaning they are no longer brother and sister…a trope that Carpenter introduced with the 1981 sequel.

It begins with two journalists visiting Smiths Grove Sanitarium in hopes of getting a face-to-face with Michael Myers, who, according to the new timeline, was captured before the events of Halloween II. He eventually escapes during transport and tracks down the journalists, retrieving his original mask in the process. He now has no other motive but to locate his non-sibling, Laurie Strode, who has been preparing for this moment her whole life, barricading herself into a cage of crazy and excluding everyone around her, including her daughter.

The end showdown is nothing short of amazing, and I thoroughly enjoyed seeing the lore come full circle.

Three and a half stars.

Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989): Although it blends with Halloween 4, I personally prefer this one for its darker atmosphere. Donald Pleasance reprises his role as Dr. Sam Loomis, protecting Jaime Lloyd (Danielle Harris), the daughter of Laurie Strode, from her murderous uncle. In this timeline, Laurie is dead, making it all the more confusing for modern moviegoers who are only familiar with the recent entries.

Halloween 4 and 5 are fun by themselves, but fail to move the franchise forward in significant ways.

Three Stars.

Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988): Some people will disagree that I put H5 ahead of H4, and in some ways, I understand. This entry rejuvenates the franchise, bringing back Myers as a central character, unlike the misdirection of Halloween III: Season of the Witch.

We are now introduced to Jamie Lloyd, Laurie’s daughter. After learning of Laurie’s demise, we understand that Michael is now stalking his niece, hoping to snuff the family bloodline.

Two and a Half Stars.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982): Michael Myers is nowhere to be found here. Halloween II was meant to be the last entry with Myers, leading to this new installment with the intent of extending Halloween lore in different directions. I personally like it, but it was a colossal flop, no one understood why it was called H3 when it departed from its previous “sequels” with no Shape to be found. It was intended to be an ongoing annual event, each year giving a new Halloween inspired theme, but unfortunately that never came to fruition. Go into it with an open mind, and you might enjoy it.

Three Stars.

Halloween H20 (1998): The year says it all. Twenty years later, this is the original Halloween (2018) forgetting H4 and H5 even exist. Laurie Strode is alive again, and she no longer has a daughter named Jamie Lloyd, she now has a son named John (Josh Hartnett) and is the headmistress of a private boarding school called Hillcrest Academy, where she has been hoping to avoid the inevitable confrontation with her brother. Her nightmares becomes a reality when Michael tracks her down, and a confrontation escalates.

This is Scream era, late ‘90s fare. If you enjoy this style, give it a shot.

Two Stars.

Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995): Before there was H20, the franchise gave one last crack at Michael’s existing reign. Paul Rudd is Tommy Jarvis, Pleasance is back as Loomis, and Michael is back as, well, himself. Donald Pleasance passed away during the filming, so the studio had to finish the film without him, and it shows. Some new lore is introduced here, in the form of something called Thorn. Hated it then, hate it now. But other than some side nonsense, it’s a fun watch if you don’t take it too seriously.

Two Stars.

Halloween Resurrection (2002): A sequel to H20 that wants to kill Laurie Strode within the first twenty minutes. I saw this in the theater and walked out immediately after said event. I’ve since seen it in its entirety and wished I hadn’t, citing temporary insanity as the cause. It revolves around a TV crew, showcasing their clichéd early 2000s internet broadcast that features a group of contestants spending a night in the Myers house. Surprise, Michael shows up. Busta Rhymes says, “Trick or treat, Motha Fu***,” and everything just sucks. Bottom of the barrel for me. Avoid it if you can.

One Star.

So there you have it, my loose reviews of the Halloween films. Let me know if you agree.

Cheers,
Phil Thomas

Boo-graphy:
Phil Thomas is an author and screenwriter from the suburbs of Philadelphia. He is a member of the International Association of Professional Writers & Editors and The Horror Writers Association. He is also the former co-host of What Are You Afraid Of? a weekly horror and paranormal show that lasted for over 150 episodes. The show still airs on Para-X radio on Friday evenings at 9:00 pm, where you’ll find interviews with wonderful guests such as Lloyd Kaufman, Katrina Weidman, Joe R. Lansdale, Grady Hendrix, Greg Bear, Daniel Kraus, and many more.

Check out his website and sign up for his mailing list so he can further control your mind, and please direct your angry hate mail to him here. You can stalk him on Twitter and Facebook.

His short stories have been featured in several anthologies, including Monsterthology 2, Nightside: Tales of Outré Noir, Coming Through in Waves: Crime Fiction inspired by the Songs of Pink Floyd, Books of Horror: Volume 3, Part 2, and the upcoming collection, Seven Doors of Fate, set to release in 2023.

His debut novel, The Poe Predicament, was published by Foundations Books on October 4, 2021 and hit the bestseller list.

Stuck in another time, Richard Langley just wants to find his way back home.

Richard is a former college professor, wandering a local neighborhood bookstore, where he stumbles upon the find of a lifetime: a signed copy of Tamerlane and other poems.

He is soon swept to another era. He is alone, confused, and his only mission is to get back to where he came from.

While struggling to adapt to his nineteenth-century environment, Richard meets a man he must help exonerate from false accusations in order to restore history’s original timeline and, ultimately, find his way back.

What Richard did not count on, was that man being the owner of the signature—Edgar Allan Poe.

CHARACTER INTERVIEW: Richard Langley (The Poe Predicament, Phil Thomas)

Meghan: Hi, Richard. Thank you for agreeing to sit down with me today. What is one word you would use to define yourself?

Richard Langley: Resilient.

Meghan: Do you see yourself as the “good guy” or the “bad guy”?

Richard Langley: I’m for sure the good guy, a victim of circumstance.

Meghan: What does the plot require you to be? How does this requirement limit you?

Richard Langley: It requires me to be strong and resilient. I’m a stranger in a strange land, cast into 1830s New York City from the twenty first century against my will. I’m limited in several ways, but most notably the unfamiliarity with my surroundings.

Meghan: What is your quest?

Richard Langley: After acquiring a signed book by Edgar Allan Poe at a local bookstore, I soon find myself in a different time period. My quest is to find my way back home to modern day New York.

Meghan: What do you hope to accomplish, find, or become during the course of your book/series?

Richard Langley: Along the way, I need to figure out how and why I ended up in the nineteenth century. I uncover a lot of mystery and meet many wonderful characters along the way, including another time traveler named Alice, and also Edgar Allan Poe himself, who I must help exonerate from a false murder accusation.

Meghan: What do you like about the other main characters? What do you least like about the other main characters?

Richard Langley: I like their companionship and kindness, their willingness to help me when in need. There are other main characters, antagonists that are vile to the core. I like nothing about them or their ill intentions towards me and Edgar Allan Poe.

Meghan: When was the last time you lied? What made you do it?

Richard Langley: I lied when asked about my modern-day attire. I had to lie to protect my identity.

Meghan: Who have you betrayed lately? What happened?

Richard Langley: In the context of the novel, I haven’t betrayed anyone. I’m the good guy.

Meghan: Would you say that you are an optimist or a pessimist?

Richard Langley: I’m an optimist. I have to keep my head up and hope alive if I expect to make it back to modern-day New York City.

Meghan: What is your superpower?

Richard Langley: I’m a problem solver and possess the uncanny ability of observation.

Meghan: What is your biggest secret?

Richard Langley: My biggest secret is that I’m a time traveler.

Meghan: Do you live in the right world?

Richard Langley: Well, the setting is literally not my home since I’m a time traveller. However, I feel that I’m extremely necessary to that world because I have a very important purpose for being there. If you’d like to find out just how important I am and follow my adventures, you can do so in the novel, The Poe Predicament.

Meghan: What is your role in this setting? Are you okay with this role or would you like it to change?

Richard Langley: My primary role is to help exonerate Edgar Allan Poe from a false murder accusation, as well as to help others along the way. At first it was a scary role, not knowing why or how I’d ended up in 1830s New York, but I soon learned just how important I was to keeping history’s natural timeline in order.

Meghan: Did you turn out the way you expected?

Richard Langley: Life has a way of twisting and turning, so I didn’t turn out exactly as I expected.

Meghan: What, if anything, would you change about your life?

Richard Langley: I would have told Alice about my affection for her sooner.

Meghan: How do you feel about your author?

Richard Langley: You mean Phil Thomas? I have nothing but positive feelings towards him.

Meghan: If the two of you got together for coffee, what would you want to say to them?

Richard Langley: I would tell him that my story doesn’t need to end where it does. We have more work to do.

[I hope you enjoyed this character interview of The Poe Predicament’s main protagonist, Richard Langley. If you’d like to follow his adventures further, the book is available to Amazon and other online outlets.]

Boo-graphy:
Phil Thomas is an author and screenwriter from the suburbs of Philadelphia. He is a member of the International Association of Professional Writers & Editors and The Horror Writers Association. He is also the former co-host of What Are You Afraid Of? a weekly horror and paranormal show that lasted for over 150 episodes. The show still airs on Para-X radio on Friday evenings at 9:00 pm, where you’ll find interviews with wonderful guests such as Lloyd Kaufman, Katrina Weidman, Joe R. Lansdale, Grady Hendrix, Greg Bear, Daniel Kraus, and many more.

Check out his website and sign up for his mailing list so he can further control your mind, and please direct your angry hate mail to him here. You can stalk him on Twitter and Facebook.

His short stories have been featured in several anthologies, including Monsterthology 2, Nightside: Tales of Outré Noir, Coming Through in Waves: Crime Fiction inspired by the Songs of Pink Floyd, Books of Horror: Volume 3, Part 2, and the upcoming collection, Seven Doors of Fate, set to release in 2023.

His debut novel, The Poe Predicament, was published by Foundations Books on October 4, 2021 and hit the bestseller list.

Stuck in another time, Richard Langley just wants to find his way back home.

Richard is a former college professor, wandering a local neighborhood bookstore, where he stumbles upon the find of a lifetime: a signed copy of Tamerlane and other poems.

He is soon swept to another era. He is alone, confused, and his only mission is to get back to where he came from.

While struggling to adapt to his nineteenth-century environment, Richard meets a man he must help exonerate from false accusations in order to restore history’s original timeline and, ultimately, find his way back.

What Richard did not count on, was that man being the owner of the signature—Edgar Allan Poe.

AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Phil Thomas

Meghan: Hi, Phil. Welcome to Meghan’s HAUNTED House of Books. What is your favorite part of Halloween?

Phil: My favorite part of Halloween is everything. When summer ends its kind of a downer, but with Halloween looming on the horizon, it seems to make everything better. To answer your question straightforward though, my favorite part of Halloween is the memories of the holiday growing up and the amazing times I had. My upcoming novel is actually set almost entirely on Halloween.

Meghan: Do you get scared easily?

Phil: No I don’t, which is why I like Halloween so much. It’s like chasing a high.

Meghan: What is the scariest movie you’ve ever seen and why?

Phil: Honestly I think it might be The Conjuring. It’s unnerving on another level.

Meghan: Which horror movie murder did you find the most disturbing?

Phil: Pretty much anything in the Saw movie franchise.

Meghan: Is there a horror movie you refused to watch because the commercials scared you too much?

Phil: I have to say no. The scarier the better.

Meghan: If you got trapped in one scary movie, which would you choose?

Phil: Halloween 1978.

Meghan: If you were stuck as the protagonist in any horror movie, which would you choose?

Phil: Tommy Jarvis, Friday the 13th part 6.

Meghan: What is your all-time favorite scary monster or creature of the night?

Phil: If we’re talking monsters, then probably Dracula, or vampires in general.

Meghan: What is your favorite Halloween tradition?

Phil: Going to some haunted houses and haunted hayrides.

Meghan: What is your favorite horror or Halloween-themed song?

Phil: The Halloween 1978 theme. It encompasses the spirit of Halloween.

Meghan: Which horror novel unsettled you the most?

Phil: I would have to say either Funland by Richard Laymon, or The Shining by Stephen King.

Meghan: What is the creepiest thing that’s ever happened while you were alone?

Phil: I once heard footsteps on my porch late at night. When I turned on the outside light, no one was there.

Meghan: Which unsolved mystery fascinates you the most?

Phil: The Jersey Devil. We need to find it asap!

Meghan: What is the spookiest ghost story that you have ever heard?

Phil: If we’re talking hauntings, then probably The Conjuring’s story.

Meghan: In a zombie apocalypse, what is your weapon of choice?

Phil: A double-barreled shotgun.

Meghan: Okay, Phil. Let’s have some fun… Would you rather get bitten by a vampire or a werewolf?

Phil: A vampire for sure!

Meghan: Would you rather fight a zombie apocalypse or an alien invasion?

Phil: Probably a zombie apocalypse because they’re slow, and when it comes to aliens, they might have technology far superior to ours.

Meghan: Would you rather drink zombie juice or eat dead bodies from the graveyard?

Phil: Aren’t they the same thing? Ha! Probably drink zombie juice.

Meghan: Would you rather stay at the Poltergeist house or the Amityville house for a week?

Phil: Definitely the Poltergeist house. It’s one of my favorite movies.

Meghan: Would you rather chew on a bitter melon with chilies or maggot-infested cheese?

Phil: I’ll take the bitter melon with chilies.

Meghan: Would you rather drink from a witch’s cauldron or lick cotton candy made of spider webs?

Phil: I’d rather lick cotton candy spider webs. It might even taste good.

Boo-graphy:
Phil Thomas is an author and screenwriter from the suburbs of Philadelphia. He is a member of the International Association of Professional Writers & Editors and The Horror Writers Association. He is also the former co-host of What Are You Afraid Of? a weekly horror and paranormal show that lasted for over 150 episodes. The show still airs on Para-X radio on Friday evenings at 9:00 pm, where you’ll find interviews with wonderful guests such as Lloyd Kaufman, Katrina Weidman, Joe R. Lansdale, Grady Hendrix, Greg Bear, Daniel Kraus, and many more.

Check out his website and sign up for his mailing list so he can further control your mind, and please direct your angry hate mail to him here. You can stalk him on Twitter and Facebook.

His short stories have been featured in several anthologies, including Monsterthology 2, Nightside: Tales of Outré Noir, Coming Through in Waves: Crime Fiction inspired by the Songs of Pink Floyd, Books of Horror: Volume 3, Part 2, and the upcoming collection, Seven Doors of Fate, set to release in 2023.

His debut novel, The Poe Predicament, was published by Foundations Books on October 4, 2021 and hit the bestseller list.

Stuck in another time, Richard Langley just wants to find his way back home.

Richard is a former college professor, wandering a local neighborhood bookstore, where he stumbles upon the find of a lifetime: a signed copy of Tamerlane and other poems.

He is soon swept to another era. He is alone, confused, and his only mission is to get back to where he came from.

While struggling to adapt to his nineteenth-century environment, Richard meets a man he must help exonerate from false accusations in order to restore history’s original timeline and, ultimately, find his way back.

What Richard did not count on, was that man being the owner of the signature—Edgar Allan Poe.

GUEST POST: Tommy B Smith

Opening Themes

Who remembers Tales from the Darkside? Can you recall that introductory sequence, the slow trip through the woods, the eerie theme music, building tension until the scene flips, colors invert, and the organ lands its ominous final note?

It imparts a sense of unease, atmospheric tension. To halt the viewing experience at this point is to leave the details of the “darkside,” an alternate place which exists in the long twilight shadows of the world, to the viewer’s imagination.

The imagination can be powerful, intimidating, and sometimes inescapable.

Speaking of horror anthology television shows of the 1980s, another opening theme that comes to mind is that of The Hitchhiker. Late at night, the opening beat would start with a hitchhiker’s solitary walk down a dirt road between desolate hills and past a rock formation. It’s this aspect I remember most of all: the setting, the sense of isolation, and minimal accompanying theme music. But from an objective standpoint, it’s just a man walking, isn’t it? Or is it?

There is more to the picture, we sense, a crucial detail askew, and more to come. As the scene fades out, this lingers on our thoughts.

Reaching even further back, I could go on to speak of The Twilight Zone, the original version created by Rod Serling, one of my favorite television shows of all time and an early influence on my work as a writer. Its theme and opening sequence needs no introduction.

Visiting an old, abandoned barn, happening across an unusual cemetery to which no road leads, or a mere stroll through the woods might serve to stir these avenues of the imagination. A late-night drive along old roads, such as one I made years back to find the Joplin Spooklight, or walking the perimeter of a school at night, with bulbs casting faint illumination across each of the locked entrances. While the building appears abandoned for the moment, the heavy silence echoes an unspoken question: are we alone here? Or are we being watched at this very moment?

Frightening? Maybe. Better yet, inspiring. Prominent fuel for an opening theme, if only in our own minds.

Looking for audio inspiration? Check out some horror film and television soundtracks such as Bernard Herrmann’s original Psycho score, 1979’s Phantasm, composed by Fred Myrow and Malcolm Seagrave, or the soundtrack to Stranger Things. John Carpenter is another who doesn’t disappoint. Look to Lost Themes for musical scores to films that never actually happened.

Every horror story must have its beginning, after all, whether the beginning of the end, a stab of sheer terror, or a moment’s speculation that leaves us uncertain but wondering, unable to turn away. It begins with the senses—the sights, the sounds—and in the darker spaces of the imagination, culminates in the question: what next?

Boo-graphy:
Tommy B Smith is a writer of horror and dark fiction, award-winning author of The Mourner’s Cradle, Poisonous, and the forthcoming Black Carmenia series. His presence currently infests Fort Smith, Arkansas, where he resides with his wife and cats.

Black Carmenia 1:
New Era
Insomnia. Headaches. Fear.

It drove Marjorie down, cost her a career, and almost destroyed her marriage. When she and her husband Terry escaped to the quiet green countryside west of the Mississippi River, their new home, it seemed too good to last.

The snake-ridden adjoining property, bordered by a row of maple trees, hosts a deadly secret. There the blood of fields and innocents stain the crumbling ruins of an old farmhouse, a decaying testament to a web of treachery and murder stretching back to distant times.

The horror in the ruins watches in wait. Marjorie fears the end, and the end is coming.

AUTHOR INTERVIEW: Tommy B Smith

Meghan: Hey, Tommy. Welcome back. Thank you for joining us here today. What is your favorite part of Halloween?

Tommy: People are apt to exercise their imaginations during the Halloween season, whether inclined toward the zany, macabre, or otherwise, expressing it by costume, decoration, or a visit to a local haunted house or attraction. For a while, horror is more widely recognized than in other times of the year, and marathons of horror films ensue, enjoyable if I have the time to watch. I also enjoy the distinctive autumn weather, when it occurs.

Meghan: Do you get scared easily?

Tommy: Not really.

Meghan: What is the scariest movie you’ve ever seen and why?

Tommy: Not an easy answer. I’ve gone through massive lists of supposed scariest movies ever and couldn’t find a single one that actually frightened me, though I love horror, but there are quite a few I’ve found to be an intense viewing experience, and that’s what I enjoy. I’ve mentioned John Carpenter’s Halloween as a favorite many times, though, and as far as horror films go, consider it top-tier in the way of atmosphere and tension.

Meghan: Which horror movie murder did you find the most disturbing?

Tommy: The gory murders are fun to watch, but it’s the tragic ends that tend to impact me more. Think of the wife from The Vanishing. It’s an end that occurs off-screen. We are given an answer, ultimately, but it leaves the details to the viewer’s imagination.

Meghan: Is there a horror movie you refused to watch because the commercials scared you too much?

Tommy: Never for that reason. If I’ve avoided a horror movie because of advertisements or previews, it’s likely because I didn’t find the idea or scenes interesting.

Meghan: If you got trapped in one scary movie, which would you choose?

Tommy: One where I had a fighting chance. A zombie movie, maybe, with slow zombies. Night of the Living Dead?

Meghan: If you were stuck as the protagonist in any horror movie, which would you choose?

Tommy: Though it’s been a while since I’ve watched it, I remember the action-driven horror movie Feast having some solid protagonists. I think of Ash from the Evil Dead films as well, though I wouldn’t want to lose an arm, even if he is well-equipped despite that. If I’m going to battle a horrific menace, I want weapons.

Meghan: What is your all-time favorite scary monster or creature of the night?

Tommy: I have a few favorites. On past occasions, I’ve mentioned human beings to be some of my favorite monsters. I find Frankenstein’s monster to be an interesting study which I appreciate more within the pages of Mary Shelley’s original tale than in any of the resulting films.

Meghan: What is your favorite Halloween tradition?

Tommy: Decorating, perhaps, though I don’t do as much of that these days. Savoring the weather with a tasty beverage is always nice, though it isn’t necessarily a Halloween tradition but an autumnal one—pumpkin ales come to mind.

Meghan: What is your favorite horror or Halloween-themed song?

Tommy: Some top choices include King Diamond’s Halloween, Helloween’s epic Halloween from the first Keeper of the Seven Keys album, and of course, Type O Negative’s Black No. 1, but I could compile entire albums of Halloween-influenced music I enjoy.

Meghan: Which horror novel unsettled you the most?

Tommy: Some of the most unsettling fiction I’ve enjoyed has arrived in the form of short stories. I think of Clive Barker’s Books of Blood and The Hellbound Heart, but these embody short story collections and a novella.

Others I’ve read more recently include Things Left Behind by Brian Keene and Mary SanGiovanni, Picking the Bones by Brian Hodge, and Bridgett Nelson’s A Bouquet of Viscera, all phenomenal reads, but again, collections, so I digress.

Speaking strictly of linear novels, I have always found Shirley Jackson’s The Haunting of Hill House to be an immersive, atmospheric, and interesting trip down an unsettling path.

Meghan: What is the creepiest thing that’s ever happened while you were alone?

Tommy: Discovering I’m not actually alone. There were occasions in which I’ve managed to get away for a moment of solitude only to discover someone standing in the dark, hidden in part, staring in silence. While I may not frighten easily, these instances can be startling and yes, creepy.

Meghan: Which unsolved mystery fascinates you the most?

Tommy: Some years ago, as archaeologists explored the Great Pyramid of Giza, a robotics team developed a robot designed to explore one of the pyramids shafts, drill a hole through a door at its end, and record what lay beyond. The results were as mysterious as the initial discovery, as the door led into another shaft with yet another door that could not be bypassed. It’s but one tiny aspect of the whole mystery of the pyramids, but one that springs to immediate memory. I find the history, design, and speculations surrounding the ancient pyramids interesting.

Early history involving the cradle of early civilization, the lore and history of Mesopotamia, Egypt, and the vanished civilization of the Norte Chico has always interested me. The latter of these inspired my 2018 horror novel, The Mourner’s Cradle.

Meghan: What is the spookiest ghost story that you have ever heard?

Tommy: The one about the malicious ghost who enters a writer’s home and deletes unfinished manuscripts from the computer, as well as backup files. Absolutely terrifying.

Meghan: In a zombie apocalypse, what is your weapon of choice?

Tommy: 9mm semi-automatic.

Meghan: Okay Tommy, let’s have some fun… Would you rather get bitten by a vampire or a werewolf?

Tommy: Vampire.

Meghan: Would you rather fight a zombie apocalypse or an alien invasion?

Tommy: Zombies.

Meghan: Would you rather drink zombie juice or eat dead bodies from the graveyard?

Tommy: A choice between dead bodily tissue or dead bodily tissue juice? I guess I would go with the juice. At least it’s quicker that way, because I wouldn’t have to chew anything.

Meghan: Would you rather stay at the Poltergeist house or the Amityville house for a week?

Tommy: Amityville.

Meghan: Would you rather chew on a bitter melon with chilies or maggot-infested cheese?

Tommy: Bitter melon with chilies. I’ve never been partial to maggot-infested cheeses.

Meghan: Would you rather drink from a witch’s cauldron or lick cotton candy made of spider webs?

Tommy: Spider web cotton candy. Spider’s webs are woven with protein for the most part, whereas a witch’s cauldron might contain any number of unknown ingredients, depending on the witch who mixed it.

Boo-graphy:
Tommy B Smith is a writer of horror and dark fiction, award-winning author of The Mourner’s Cradle, Poisonous, and the forthcoming Black Carmenia series. His presence currently infests Fort Smith, Arkansas, where he resides with his wife and cats.

Black Carmenia 1:
New Era
Insomnia. Headaches. Fear.

It drove Marjorie down, cost her a career, and almost destroyed her marriage. When she and her husband Terry escaped to the quiet green countryside west of the Mississippi River, their new home, it seemed too good to last.

The snake-ridden adjoining property, bordered by a row of maple trees, hosts a deadly secret. There the blood of fields and innocents stain the crumbling ruins of an old farmhouse, a decaying testament to a web of treachery and murder stretching back to distant times.

The horror in the ruins watches in wait. Marjorie fears the end, and the end is coming.